Training and Trust

The training allocations panel have met and decided that from September I will be staying at SEITE to complete two years further theological study before being stationed. There are many reasons that I am very grateful for this decision - My Learning Support is all set up through Kent University and it will be easier to continue that now. My children won't have to move schools/colleges for another two years. I haven't got to pack all this stuff up again. I quite like SEITE in a funny sort of way, and it saves having to leave my comfort zone and try something new.

However this is me trying to find the positives in what feels like a really horrid decision because what this actually means is another two years caught in the poverty trap with no obvious means of escape - we have spent the last two years living by faith and although God has never let us down and the money we have needed has always turned up -eventually!  It has been quite a tiring way to live and I was looking forward to a grant and a change of lifestyle. It seems strange that, what for many people would seem a small amount of money would have made such a huge difference to our lives. I have no idea how we are going to manage another two years, I just have to trust God has it all in hand

Tiggerish

I have now spent an exhausting 40hrs bouncing about, since the news broke of my acceptance for Presbyteral Ministry within the Methodist Church. Swinging between being absolutely overjoyed and almost overwhelmed by the immensity of what those words actually mean.

Today I have come down from the ceiling a bit because there are still things to be done - real life things (even though it doesn't feel much like real life at the moment!).

I have filled in my forms for the training allocations panel and now I have to wait(again!!) until they meet on the 20th May. After that I will be informed of their decision about what happens next and where I will be in September.

Monday sees the return to normality properly - there are essays to write as usual, and services to prepare.

All you need to know today

Three more nights

I really believed that once the interview was over and there was nothing else I could do, that I would feel better. I had no idea that the waiting would be this painful. I have re-lived in extraordinary detail, every single moment of the interview. Especially the bits I don't feel like I did very well in. The weekend was quite a nice distraction, but my stress levels are reaching the peak of their limits. I have three more restless nights to go. The up side of all of this waiting, has been the chance to listen to the audiobook of Brian MacLaren's "New Kind of Christian" because I am unable to concentrate on anything else - like essay writing!! Tomorrow I am off to college and Wednesday I am speaking at the Women's Friendly Hour then the waiting will be over and the results will be out - next update then.

Today's the day!!

Well here it is, the morning of the Connexional Interviews. It was very unlike me but I woke at 5 this morning (maybe my body is a bit nervous!!) and I still feel strangely calm. Much better than I did on the day of the district interview. Whatever happens over the next two days I am at least assured of a mountain of prayers to sustain me - thank you all x 

one left

Sunday and it's the day before the interviews. I have been overwhelmed  with the messages and love shown by so many. This mornings service at Hailsham was incredibly affirming, and the last thing on my "to do" list before "panic about candidating" but actually I am feeling surprisingly calm about the whole process.

3, 2, 1 we have lift off!

Three days to go - I can definitely feel the stress levels rising. I have finished Sunday's service and the presentation for the interview (but will probably fiddle with that till I am ready to go!)It is so lovely to have heard from so many people that they are thinking of me and remembering me in their prayers( Catholic prayers from Kate added to the list today!!), I do feel very supported and uplifted. But I knew today as I cleaned the cooker that the nerves had indeed set in!!(apart from when we moved house, the last time i willingly cleaned the oven was the day before my one-to-one foundation training interview!!) I have become very aware of God's presence and marvelous hand holding ability and hope to cling to that throughout the weekend